Holiday Spirit

It's been about, oh, six years or so since I have participated in a holiday decorating ceremony/ritual/party/job (all of the above). 

When I was little, I remember being so excited to adorn the house in Christmas apparel. Karen (my mom) would pull out her absurdly large collection of Christmas decor, and she would lay it all out on the family room floor for my brother and I to admire.

Let's get one thing straight here... this was no ordinary stockpile.  Over the years, Karen had built up an impressive assortment of any and all types of festive doodads.

And I'll be damned if I wasn't ready to Christmafy every nook and cranny of that house.  Once those ornaments and doohickeys were splayed out in front of me, it was game on.  This was SERIOUS.

My brother Mike and I would scamper around the house embellishing window sills, end tables, bookshelves, televisions, counter tops, railings, bathrooms, bedrooms, porches, door knobs, tissue boxes (yes!).  You see, Karen had a "thing" with Christmas.  She still does.... 

...and consequently, so do I.  Though I didn't realize it until recently, when it was time to orchestrate my own holiday decorating extravaganza, I have inherited my mom's Christmas cheer.

We put up our first Whitfield tree a couple of weekends back.  It is just the perfect piece of eye candy to get me in the holiday spirit.  Scott (my dad) and Bren (my hub) put the tree up and strung the lights.  Karen (momma) and Liam (my baby boy) helped hang bulbs and ornaments and bows.  And before I knew it, it was brightening everything around me, inside of me, through me.  I had forgotten... just how much significance decorating carried.  How much the decorations meant.  And most of all, how much I absolutely love sharing the process with my family.

Mom--- Thank you for passing on your holiday enthusiasm to me.  I love you, and your crazy obsession with tissue box covers!

 

What Matters

Time- spent with my husband and my son; spent with my family and friends; spent in solitude and silence.

Space- for Liam to grow and play and dance and create; for Brendon and I to connect and count our blessings; for the newness we have yet to uncover.

Blankets- to cuddle in; to keep warm; to build forts and castles; to dream.

Pictures- to take; to reflect; to commemorate; to remember; to pass on.

Water- to stay healthy and hydrated; to take bubble baths; to rejuvenate; to splash and swim... and float.

To stay involved and engaged with those whom I love, admire and appreciate.

To read; to learn; to generate; to keep moving; to teach.

To pay it forward; to listen and advise; to smile and frown; to laugh and cry.

To keep my heart and ears open and my shoulder available, free of charge.

To ask for help when I need it; to teach Liam to do the same.

To lead by example and follow graciously.

To put love and kindness in the fore-front of my daily motives.

To love my husband, and allow him to treat me well.

To hug my father.

To honor my mom and my dad by being the best version of myself that I can possibly be.

To accept myself; to lower my expectations.

To be gentle.

Love

What is it about me that is
so bad, so terrible,
so unbearable,
that you would so suddenly
and easily
dismiss me?

What is it about my weaknesses
that make my strengths forgettable?
How can you possibly see me
for only my negative qualities?
Especially you.

I am a mix of good and bad…
just like every other person
living and breathing
on this earth.

When I am bad, I am very very bad,
but when I am good, I am lovely.
Does that not count for any
part of my character?

What do I have to be for you to love me?
Perfect?
What do I have to do for you to be able to handle me?
Shut up?

There you are… pointing your finger at me.

Do you think you’re flawless?
Do you think that I don’t have my own grievances
about you?

I promise you, I do.
But I love you.
I love you for the whole package-
flaws and all.

So in the end,
I realize...
This IS about love

(or at least it should be).