Some "things" have come to light over the last couple of weeks.
What started as an exciting adventure for my family quickly turned into a source of confusion and sadness. If you read my last
post, you know what it is I am talking about.
[But you know, nothing is every written in stone], and this is especially true of our most recent turmoil.
I have not announced this over Facebook yet because I just didn't know how to... instead, I was telling people as they asked. It was just easier for me that way. But I am getting more and more questions, and people are very confused. So I figured it was time to elaborate a bit for those who don't know the whole story but would like to.
So here goes...
As some of you know, it has been such a tough past few weeks for Bren and I. A few weeks ago, we went in for our first ultrasound-- excited to see the baby, ready to expose Liam to who would eventually be his sibling, all around happy.
It was at this appointment that the doctor told us that it looked to be a "bad pregnancy." I immediately reached out to my doctor who told me that I was likely miscarrying the baby; that it had stopped developing at 5 weeks even though my LMP showed me being 11 weeks along.
She sent me in for blood work to corroborate what she thought was happening, and then scheduled me for a "final ultrasound," telling me, "We'll get you through this honey. A lot of women go through this." (A sad truth).
She told me I could do it on my own (at home), but that it could possibly take months for my body to recognize that it wasn't a legitimate pregnancy. (Um, no thanks).
Our/my other option was to have it removed at the hospital (via D&C). Not fun stuff. Obviously, this was a tough thing to hear.
I guess the hardest part about all of this can be summed up into two parts:
1- I had already told everyone I was pregnant. Now what?
2- I still felt pregnant physically and had already started to bond with the pregnancy itself. Now I would have to begin to emotionally separate myself.
The next Friday (almost 2 weeks ago now), before I was supposed to go into the hospital, they sent me in for my final ultrasound, a pre-op verification.
About 30-seconds into the ultrasound, the technician turned the screen for me to see, and pointed to a baby and a heartbeat.
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| Baby Whitfield (due 10-16-11) |
It turns out that I am one of the very lucky ones whose very EARLY pregnancy was mistaken (medically) for a miscarriage.
I'm not sure how lucky I felt throughout the week that I thought I had lost the baby, but I feel extremely blessed now.
Today I am a little over 8 weeks along.
Bren and I appreciate everyone's kind wishes and warm thoughts. We have wonderful people in our lives, and we have never (and will never) overlook you. Thank you all for your support.
All our love
